OK - I've made my decision - and two appointments!
Third friend called back - had same OBGYN as other friend that was not happy (the third friend said she thought the doc was OK, but a bit cold).
No news yet from the one with the midwife contact, but I wanted my mind to stop racing and make an appointment for that first ultrasound soon. So got in touch with my friend who gave me the very positive recommendation and asked her about the separate ultrasound person - she said that she had that with both her pregnancies (in two different cities) and she would highly recommend her ultrasound doctor too (not one from the list that the other doc's assistant had given me).
So I first called the ultrasound office - appointment for next Friday, October 31 (they first wanted to schedule me for December, but I said that my RE had told me I needed the first ultrasound 25-30 days after the transfer), yay! Called the doctor's office right after that - appointment for the same day, after the ultrasound.
Feel OK about the decision. If after the first visits I have the feeling that I need to see someone more specialized, I can always change, right?