Tuesday, January 20, 2009

The (lost) charm of being a "Sunday Child"

I was born on a Sunday. So was my husband. They say (at least in Holland) that children born on a Sunday carry an extra charm, and will often have good luck in their lives...

It seemed to be true when I was living in Holland. Pretty much everything went pretty smoothly. I was chosen among 100 candidates to go on an educational trip abroad when in high school, I passed a difficult college entrance exam. I found the love of my life (although it took a while), I had the best job in the world. But I think I lost that charm when I left Holland to join my hubby in his career pursuit and gave up my own super job and with it part of my identity.

On my CV, it doesn't seem that I gave up my career at that moment. My job in the US looks great on paper, but I hated it. When we moved to France (which I was happy about, because I was escaping from this job), I thought it would be relatively easy to find a job again. No work permit issues like in the US. But 3.5 years and many applications later, I've only been invited to a handful of interviews and never made it to a second round.

A gap in your CV is a big sin in France, but if I got to the interview stage, what kept coming up was the question if my hubby would be changing jobs and countries again soon, because they "don't want to start another search in three months". And (yes, they know they're not allowed to ask), "What about children?" Thank you all so much for your confidence! Grr...

My hubby had a bad day at work two weeks ago. He saw a job ad and applied. He got invited. He made it to the second round. They didn't ask him if his wife had a career or intended to change countries again, if he had little children he had to take care of. No, they just looked at his qualifications, were convinced by what he told them and if he hadn't said 'no' to the second round (after some good discussion at home), he'd probably would have gotten the job. Mind you, the job he currently has is awesome. He has a great career. He's building a super network. OK, I know, I'm jealous. I know I shouldn't be, because jealousy is a useless emotion (I'm quoting my wise sister here).

And another thing about this Sunday Child Charm - why did it take us a f**ing five years to get pregnant?!

I think we both lost the charm for a while. Seems my hubby has definitely found it again. And I'm hoping it's coming back to me to. So that the pregnancy will continue normally and result in a healthy baby. That maybe this part-time job opening that was talked about two weeks ago is really going to happen. I know I shouldn't complain. We're very blessed. I just woke up crying today. Blame it on the hormones... (and thankfully I have a blog to vent my frustration!)


Lori Lavender Luz said...

It doesn't seem right, the way men and women are treated differently for professional positions.

I do hope the charm came back since you wrote this post. I suspect it has :-)

(Here from Time Warp Tuesday).

Kathy said...

Here from the future via Time Warp Tuesday and really enjoyed this flashback with you! I don't recall knowing about the charm of Sunday children, but it is an interesting and fun thought! I too hope that some of that charm has come back over the past four years and from perspective, I would say it has! :)

I believe that I was born on a Thursday, as were all three of my children... Now I am curious what that means! Thanks so much for sharing and welcome to Time Warp! :)

Kathy said...

P.S. I appreciate your frustration with how men/your husband and women/you can be treated in employment situations. Years ago when I was interviewing for a job, I was asked about if I planned to start a family with my husband soon. I knew it was an illegal topic for them to ask and that I had no obligation to answer. That said, I was honest that we did want to start a family sometime soon and I ended up both getting the job and getting pregnant soon after and eventually becoming a SAHM! I know my situation was unique, but I have always found it interesting how it played out... :)

Kathy said...

P.P.S. I keep remembering other things I wanted to mention/comment on... I love your sister's advice, about jealously being a useless emotion! I need to try to remind myself of that more often, as I allow myself to wallow to much in it.