Vacation hiatus

We're on vacation - in search for the sun. Back to blogging in about three weeks...


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13w0d - second OB appointment

Just came back from my OB appointment and subsequent blood tests. Everything is fine (which I already more or less knew from last Wednesday's ultrasound).

BP: 110/? (I thought she said 40, but that cannot be true - and I didn't ask again)

Weight: +2 kg from last month's appointment - and it's true, I can eat all day! Favorites: potatoes (especially potato salad), green beans (which I normally don't really like), chips - anything salty really, not much of a sweet tooth these days.

Cervix: long and closed

Uterus: 'supple' (intestines not so much - have horrible constipation. Doc prescribed me something for it, hopefully it'll help!)

Continuing the baby aspirin, but I can now stop the progesterone suppositories. Yay!

Overall she said that I gave the impression of being very serene about the pregnancy (I guess I am, in any case much more so than about work!).

Then after I saw the OB I went to the lab for the monthly blood work (toxoplasmosis) and urine sample plus the T21 blood test. Results for the latter will be communicated via my OB (might even have to wait until the next appointment...). Nuchal scan at the ultrasound showed no signs to worry though, so I hope the blood test will confirm that.

Still a little less than two weeks before we go on vacation! Can't wait...

Wordless Wednesday - 12 week scan

Sharing stories

A little over a month ago I had lunch with someone to ask her to come work with me and another woman on the organization of a one-day conference planned for November. It was the day of our first scan and somehow I told her that day that I was pregnant (I don't exactly remember why, but it had something to do with that she was telling me to go after this, do that, apply for jobs, etc. and I couldn't think of any good excuse so I just told her I was pregnant - it was also after that meeting that I wrote here that I felt like a complete professional failure).

Anyway… I knew that she had one child, and she mentioned that when applying for jobs she didn't mention her age, marital status and whether she had kids or not (it is quite common in France to provide all that info, including a picture of yourself…) because it had led to questions before about whether or not she wanted another child, etc. I didn't ask her about it, figuring there must be a story - secondary infertility, or something else.

She joined the team, got very active (which is great, and I love it, but it also drives me nuts because I see myself in her but can't do what she does right now because of my pregnancy fatigue) and last Thursday, during a break in our 6-hour meeting, she told me that she had had four miscarriages when trying for baby #2 - all just before the end of the first trimester. Her revelation was triggered by the fact that she asked about my pregnancy and I told her that I would have our 12-week scan next week (of course after hearing her story now I'm freaked out something is going to be horribly wrong - and the fact that hubby told me he has to be away for business that day doesn't make it any easier).

So of course I told her our IF story too, and heard more details about hers. When her employer found out about her first miscarriage, he summoned her into his office and asked her what the hell she had been thinking getting pregnant (as she had just been working there for nine months and recently had gotten a fixed contract - he made it seem like she was taking advantage of the situation). If I ever meet this guy I will punch him in the face!

Her doctors kept telling her that she was young and could still have lots of babies. Even after miscarriage #3… No one talked to her about RPL and she had to go back to her home country to get all the blood tests done (she did consult a lot with Dr Google, so she asked her doctors for lots of test, but most of them just ignored her), her new OB (a colleague of my RE - whom she also saw, btw, but then she fell pregnant again so he just referred her to the OB, who told her she was just worrying too much...).

When she started bleeding again - miscarriage #4 - and couldn't get hold of her OB, she went back to the one who delivered her son. Finally people started listening to her. She had a hysteroscopy, they found adenomyosis (endometriosis of the uterus). She's now under the care of another specialist, again trying naturally. I do hope she's now finally under proper medical care and her RPL will be taken very seriously. I cannot imagine how stressful those 13 weeks of the first trimester must be for her. I can only wish her lots of strength and luck.

I'm still here

Thanks St Elsewhere to giving me a little push to post again.

Have been wanting to do that for a long time, but either didn't have the energy or the time. Right now I have a splitting headache, but am babysitting at my neighbors (using our own wifi) while hubby is at home with our toddler - and since normally hubby doesn't want me to be typing away in the evening hours (while him sitting with his ipad on the couch all evening is perfectly OK and absolutely not the same thing…), I have to take the opportunity to update my blog.

Not that there's that much to tell, to be honest. I've been mainly either extremely busy or extremely tired. More the latter than the former, but since the fatigue makes me have to take naps, I get behind with my work, and don't ever seem to get through my to-do lists, which is frustrating the hell out of me.

I went to Holland for three days with our son, because I had to sign some papers for my dad's tax filing concerning the inheritance and my mom's tombstone (although it's not a stone, but glass, with pebbles underneath, but I don't know what I should call it) had been ready for a few weeks and I wanted to see that as well. My sister and her kids had arrived in Holland from California a few days earlier, so it was a nice opportunity to see them too.

But man, was it exhausting. First of all, my dad was super stressed and distracted (it already started at the airport when he came to pick us up - didn't know where he had parked the car, so we were wandering through the car park for a few minutes before we finally found it). This mainly because of his new relationship and the way my sister deals with it (not well). And also because this woman is so different from my mom, that he has to get used to that too - which makes him uncertain and stressed. And besides, they mainly communicate via text messages, which of course leads oftentimes to misunderstandings and almost break-ups etc. I can tell you, I'm already getting some training for when my son will hit puberty and get his first girlfriend! Pfff…

Then of course I tried to plan too many things in those three days, which I had to abandon almost immediately, because I was way too tired (partly due to the situation above, partly because my dad's house lacks blinds in front of his windows, and curtains didn't keep out the sun that was shining into my son's room at 5:30 am - so he would be wide awake by that time).

So I was somewhat relieved when the day arrived that we would fly home again. Only to find a message from the airline when I woke up that our direct morning flight had been cancelled and that they'd rebooked us on a flight in the afternoon via Paris. Ugh. Both flights were delayed as well. My son was a trooper on the first flight but fatigue overtook him on the second one, so he only cried, until he fell asleep, then woke up when they started the descend, and then cried again until we were in the terminal. To make it all complete, our luggage had stayed in Amsterdam and was only returned to us three days later…

Of course the next day I had belly cramps and lower back pain all day and it took me a while to recuperate. Last week was better, but trying to catch up on work, which worked relatively well, but still get frustrated when I see how much someone else on my team is getting done while I have a few items for this big project on my to-do list that have been there for about two months. I know, she's not pregnant (but ah, I will dedicate a post to her next as hers is not an easy story either), so I have an excuse, but I don't always want to have to hide behind that.

OK, I think I'm going to search for some chips here now (or call hubby to bring me some…)