Monday, September 15, 2014

#MicroblogMondays: to party or not to party

The other day in the park M. Sensible was a bit upset because one of his best kindergarten friends was going over (together with his parents and little sister) to M. Sensible's best friend/girlfriend that evening and of course M. Sensible wanted to go too. So I said I understood, but explained that we can't just all go join everyone without invitation, and I sure would talk to his mom so we could plan a playdate soon too. Well, ok, ok, but of course he still felt a bit left out. And funnily so did I - Why? Why do I always think that they don't like me as much as the others because they set up more dinner dates together? So I tried to kick myself in the ass and told me to get some self-confidence.
The next day we saw everyone again at a birthday party of yet another kindergarten friend. One of the two moms looked really tired and hungover. Turned out the dinner date had actually been a sleepover, lots of alcohol was consumed by the adults and of course they hadn't hit their pillow before 3 am and she was woken up by her baby at 5:30 am, with the other kids following at 7 am. I felt conflicted. There was the little jealous pang again for missing out on a fun evening but at the same time I know that even if I am invited or going out for a girls night, I always go home as one of the first ones because for me feeling like sh*t the day after (which then also means yelling at my kids etc) is too high a price to pay for just a fun night. That probably makes me boring, or at least sensible (a label I've been given my entire life already). I could add that the other two moms are at least 5 years younger than me but I don't think age has anything to do with it. Even when I was a teenager my parents wondered if I shouldn't be out dancing with friends on a Friday night...
Do you like going out late (and getting drunk) with friends even when you know you will not have the chance to sleep in and you might be grumpy and unpleasant to everyone around you the following day? Or are you so lucky to have a partner who would just take over the next day so you can recuperate (which is not the case for me)?

#MicroblogMondays is another great idea from Mel at Stirrup Queens. Join in!

11 comments:

aryanhwy said...

I'm very rarely a person to go out and get drunk, even before I had a kid! But I had a depressing reminder of how "old" I'm getting over the weekend. I was in Lisbon for a conference -- I love Lisbon, it is one of my favorite cities, and in 2010/2011 I was there pretty regularly as a colleague lived there and we were working on a number of joint projects. We'd work hard all day, and then head downtown for dinner and then go dancing, something I don't do nearly enough because my husband Does. Not. Dance. (Not even at our wedding). Those were great evenings.

This time? Friday night a bunch of us went out to dinner, and we finished around 9:30pm. The local offered to take anyone interested out to a bar for post-dinner drinks, and I realized with a pang that: Here was a rare, child-free chance to go out in a city that I love and hang out with interesting people, and all I wanted to do was go back to the hotel and sleep. (Thankfully, I was comforted by the fact that two others -- both roughly my age -- ALSO wanted to go back. What party poopers we were...)

JB said...

I'm definitely more like you. I'm always the one to leave first because if I can even get a little extra sleep on the weekends, I'll take it. Last weekend we went out on Friday for my friend's 30th. Now, I'm prego and can't drink anyway, but we didn't make it to bed until almost 1 am. and then toddler woke up at 7:30. Not terrible sleep, but honestly, all I wanted to do was go to bed all day.

Not worth it.

Mina said...

I would really like for my children to not experience having one or both parents drunk or hungover. I have had enough of that as a child myself. And so did my husband. We do enjoy having a drink, and we often have one when we eat, but no more than one or two. With two small children, and no outside help whatsoever (the burden of being an expat), we can't truly afford oblivion through alcohol anyway. I am sure my age has a lot to say on this matter as well. Oh, well. I'm off to tell those kids to gerroff me lawn!

sharah said...

I do like to go out with my friends, and do on a pretty regular basis. I've been so sleep deprived for so long that an extra night really doesn't make a difference. And if I'm going to be up anyway, I'd rather be out having fun.

tulika singh said...

Me too.. i love my sleep way more than a party and on weekdays it's a complete no no. Kids in bed by 9 and I'm off a little later. It does ruffle some feathers sometimes when i get up to leave early but it helps to have a rule and people accept it and expect it over time. Friends rag me good naturedly calling me a military sergeant and that's fine.

Turia said...

I got almost all of my partying out in the first semester of my undergrad, and was then famous for going home from the bar when everyone else was just getting started.

I am such a lightweight two glasses of wine makes me tipsy. And I am a homebody. So it is very very rare that I go out and stay out late. I'd rather have a good sleep and be recharged for the next day!

Valery said...

So glad you posted!
I don't drink, never have, most likely never will. So generally, as the night goes on I get a bit bored with drunk conversation. Plus I get cold when I'm tired.(In my twenties that was usually the excuse to get held by some warm arms. Not always the best idea)
By midnight I'm in bed.

areyoukiddingme said...

I'm not much of a drinker, because I hate to be hung over and I usually have to drive home. But I don't mind staying out late.

But I always feel left out when my daughter's friends parents get the kids together and socialize and we're not a part of the group. And then I remember that I'm old, compared to them, and we have nothing in common. But it still stings a little.

Lori Lavender Luz said...

I'm always happy to pass on those experiences.

I can't remember the last time I was able to sleep in -- not just because of obligations, but because my dang internal timer just won't let me anymore.

Lollipop Goldstein said...

Oh! I am the same way. I'll lament not getting an invitation, especially when I see the pictures on Facebook.

But then I'll think about how I am so much happier at home. I like being in my pyjamas, reading in bed. I don't like being dressed up and drinking and going out.

Buttermilk said...

I rarely go out anymore except for special occasions, like friends visiting from out of town. When I go out I try to be mindful of how much I drink and what time I go home. I'm on Morning Toddler Duty seven days a week and I’m more sensitive to alcohol (and prone to hangovers) than I used to be. No surprise there, since I'm a little out of practice.
I remember weekends when I was fruitlessly trying to conceive, my husband and I would make plans to party with friends and the whole production had just lost its luster. I would just wish I had a baby to stay home with instead.